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SHORT DENTIST JOKES

SHORT DENTIST JOKES

Dentist to parsimonious patient "No, we give no discount for empty spaces when cleaning and polishing teeth Mrs. Borde!"

A good dentist is a little picky, a great dentist never gets on your nerves.

A group of nagging dentists discovered a new chemical element. It’s called Flossphorus.

A man got kicked out of the dentist’s office for using all the nitrous oxide… He got the last laugh, though.

After my root canal I wasn't liking my dentist, then he made a good impression.

An orthodontist gets to the root of the problem.

Cloyd went to a Charleston dentist complaining his gums had shriveled up and his teeth were falling out.

Dentist to parsimonious patient "No, we give no discount for empty spaces when cleaning and polishing teeth Mrs. Borde!"

Dentist: Don't worry. I'm painless. Patient: I'm not.

Dentists are helping you put your money where your mouth is.

Dentists brighten up the world, one smile at a time.

Dentists have their own flossify on how to keep teeth clean.

Dentists practice their trade by going through many drills.

Dentists seem to have their own flossify on how to keep teeth clean…

Did you hear about the dentist who planted a garden?

Did you hear about the dentist who planted a garden? A month later he was picking his teeth

Father: Don't you feel better now that you've gone to the dentist? Son: Sure do. He wasn't in.

Has your tooth stopped hurting yet? I don’t know; the dentist kept it

Have you ever come across a man who, at the slightest touch, caused you to thrill and tremble in every fiber of your being? Yes, the dentist.

He said to put my money where my mouth is, so I got gold fillings.

How are false teeth like stars? Both only come out at night!

How did the dentist become a brain surgeon?
His drill slipped

How do dentists practice their trade?
Lots of drills.

How Do the Dentist and the Manicurist Fight?
Tooth and Nail.

How many dentists does it take to change a lightbulb?
One to administer the anesthetic, one to extract the lightbulb, and one to offer the socket mouthwash

I got my job at the dentist’s office by word of mouth.

I have to have a root canal done. Just the thought of it is unnerving.

I was able to find a new dentist’s office by word of mouth.

I was feeling a little crooked, but my dentist straightened me out.

I'm suffering from bad breath. You should do something about it! I did. I just sent my wife to the dentist.

If a kid has 25 candy bars and they eat 22 of them, what do they have? Cavities.

If I ever hear another Dentist joke, I’ll be down in the mouth.

If someone takes 25 candy bars and eats 22 of them, what do they have? Cavities…

If you strike oil while drilling, we’ll split the profits.

Ignore your teeth and they will go away.

In Panama, dental care is called a route canal.

Me without you is like a nerd without braces, a shoe without laces, asentencewithoutspaces.

Monster: Doctor, doctor, I'm a blood-sucking monster and I keep needing to eat doctors. Doctor: Oh what a shame. I'm a dentist.

My dentist asked me to open up, but I don’t know him well enough to confide in him.

My dentist calls himself the King of the dentists because he specializes in crowns.

My dentist has a TV in the exam room. I go there for Netflix and drill.

My dentist said I should try flossing more, so now I’m taking dance lessons. (The Floss is the name of a funny dance move)

My dentist said I should try flossing more. I’ve started taking dance lessons now.

My dentist’s favorite song is "The Yanks Are Coming"

My teeth were stained, so the dentist asked me, "do you smoke or drink coffee?" I told him I drink it.

Patient: Doc, what should I do with all the gold and silver in my mouth? Dentist: Don't smile in a bad neighborhood.

Patient: Doctor, if I give up candy, pizza, popcorn and gum, will my braces come off sooner? Dentist: Not really. It will just seem longer.

Patient:Do you extract teeth painlessly? Dentist: "Not always, the other day I nearly dislocated my wrist.

Stammering Charlie to dentist's sexy secretary: "I have an appointment to get my morals - er molars checked."

Ten years without brushing causes a horrible tooth decade.

Ten years without brushing causes horrible tooth decade.

The Dalai Lama is a little off today after having his wisdom tooth removed.

The lawyer asked his dentist to give him a retainer.

They called him the king of the dentists because he specialized in crowns.

Until it came out in conversation, no one knew she had a dental implant.

What award did the dentist win? A little plaque.

What did Al Gore say when he went to the dentist?
"I have an Inconvenient Tooth."

What did Ash Ketchum say to the wiggly tooth he was about to pull out?
I chews you!!

What did one dentist say to the other dentist when they were on a roller coaster?
Brace yourself

What did the dentist do before opening his office?
He was a DRILL sergeant in the Army.

What did the dentist say to his golfing buddy?
You have a hole in one.

What did the dentist say to the computer?
You have an under-byte.

What did the dentist say to the golfer?
"You have a hole in one."

What did the dentist say to the judge?
I promise to pull the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth

What did the dentist say to the tooth when he had to leave the room?
I’ll fill you in when I get back.

What did the dentist say when Jack Nicklaus came in for a check-up?
You have a hole in one!

What did the dentist say when Tiger Woods came in for an appointment?
You have a hole in one.

What did the dentist see in the Arctic?
A molar bear.

What did the Guelph dentist see at the North Pole?
A molar bear.

What did the Kitchener dentist say to the computer?
This won’t hurt a byte.

What did the tooth say as the dentist walked out of the room?
You can fill me in when you get back.

What did the tooth say to the departing dentist?
Fill me in when you get back.

What did the vampire call his false teeth?
A new fangled device.

What do dentists call the x-rays they take of patients’ teeth?
Tooth pics.

What do dentists call their x-rays of teeth?
Tooth pics.

What do tuba players use to brush their teeth?
A tuba toothpaste.

What do you call a bad dentist?
And Awfuldontist

What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.

What do you call a dentist who doesn't like tea?
Denis.


What do you call a doctor that didnt get into medical school?
Dentist.

What do you call a Panda with no teeth?
A gummy bear.

What do you get if you cross teeth with candy?
Dental floss.

What does a dentist do during an earthquake?
She braces herself!

What does a dentist do on a roller coaster?
He braces himself.

What does the dentist do when he’s on a roller coaster?
Brace himself.

What does the dentist give a bear with a hurting tooth?
Anything it wants.

What does the dentist of the year get?
A little plaque.

What game did the dentist play when he was a child?
Caps and robbers

What happened when the dentist went on a date with the manicurist?
They fought tooth and nail

What is a dentist's favorite animal?
A molar bear!

What Is a Dentist's Office?
A filling station.

What is a dentist’s favorite soda?
All of them

What is a drill team?
A group of dentists who work together.

What is another name for a dentist’s office?
A filling station.

What is it called when a dentist makes a mistake?
Accidental

What job did the dentist have when she was in the army?
Drill sergeant

What made the snowman go to see a dentist?
He was suffering from frostbite.

What should a dentist give a monster with a toothache?
Anything it wants.

What to do you call an old dentist?
A bit long in the tooth.

What Was the Dentist Doing in Panama?
Looking for the Root Canal!

What was the Toronto dentist doing in Panama?
Looking for the Root Canal.

What's a Toothache?
A pain that drives people to extraction.

What's the best thing to put into a pizza?
Your teeth.

What's the Difference Between a Dentist and a Sadist?
A dentist has newer magazines!

What’s a dentist’s favourite dance?
The floss!

What’s the dentist’s favorite kind of dinosaur?
A floss-iraptor.

When I went to the dentist, he put all caps on my teeth.
Now I can’t stop shouting.

When is the most popular time for people to visit the dentist?
At tooth-hurty (2:30)

Which dinosaurs listen to their dentist’s advice?
Floss-iraptors.

Which teeth do you need to brush?
The ones you want to keep.

Which teeth do you need to brush?
The ones you would like to keep.

Who Has the Most Dangerous Job in Transylvania?
Dracula's dentist.

Who’s job is the most dangerous in Transylvania?
The dentist who works on Dracula.

Why did the blonde go to the dentist?
Someone dented her car.

Why did the cheerleader go to the dentist?
Because she knew he would enjoy her root-ine

Why did the cheerleader go to the dentist?
She needed a root canal.

Why did the computer go to the dentist?
Because it had Bluetooth.

Why did the deer need braces?
He had buck teeth.

Why did the dentist go to Panama?
He was looking for the root canal.

Why did the guru refuse Novocain at the dentist?
He wanted to transcend dental medication

Why did the king go to the dentist?
To get his teeth crowned!

Why did the Queen go to the dentist?
To get a new crown.

Why did the Royal Queen go to the dentist?
To get her teeth crowned.

Why did the snowman visit a dentist?
He had frostbite.

Why did the snowman visit the orthodontist?
To correct his frostbite.

Why did the two dentists get married?
Because they were so enameled of each other

Why did the yellow tooth not find the white tooth’s jokes funny?
Because he was already dead inside

Why didn’t the dentist ask his secretary out?
He was already taking out a tooth.

Why didn’t the dentist pick up Chinese take-out food on the way home?
He was already taking out a tooth.

Why do dentists like potatoes?
Because they are so filling.

Why do dentists never lie?
Because the tooth always comes out

Why do dentist’s seem unhappy?
They always look down in the mouth…

Why do people dislike going to the dentist?
Because he is boring.

Why Should You Be Nice to Your Dentist?
Because they have fillings too.

Why was the cheerleader at the dentist’s office?
She needed a ROOT canal

Why was the man arrested for looking at sets of dentures in a dentist's window? Because it was against the law to pick your teeth in public.

Word-of-mouth was how I got my job at the dentist’s office.

You don't have to brush all your teeth, just the ones you want to keep.

Your like my false teeth, I can't smile without you.